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joelbrownwellness

Set realistic New Year's resolutions

Learn how to make them stick.

We've all promised ourselves that we were going to start doing... something in the new year. Start going to the gym. Start saving more money. Start eating more veggies. Get a new job. We want to lose 20 pounds, make more money, be happier at work, drink less alcohol, and spend more time with our families. We want to do all the things, all at the same time. But honestly, that's just not realistic. About 80% of resolutions fail.


The main problem with New Year's resolutions is that we set unrealistic expectations for what what we want to achieve and when. We somehow expect to lose 25 pounds in 3 months without a plan for how to get it done. So when we run low on motivation and it starts to get hard, we give up.


Motivation and willpower are batteries that can run out of juice pretty fast. We make the mistake of thinking we need more motivation to keep our new routine going, or to tap a deeper well of willpower to muscle through when the going gets tough. But the truth is that when motivation and willpower run out, all you're left with is consistency. If you haven't built a solid, consistent habit, chances are you won't be able to maintain your momentum. But habits are hard to make, so what are you supposed to do?


Set small, realistic goals

The reason your resolutions fail so often is because your goals are too big, or you are trying to do too many things at once. Instead of trying to lose 25 pounds in 3 months by going to the gym 5 days a week, start by adding a 30 minute walk to your day for 5 days a week. Or committing to a once a week fitness class with a friend.


Setting a small goal, one that is easily added to your daily life, and sticking with it for 6-8 weeks will help to develop it as a habit. No, walking for 30 minutes 5 times a week won't drop 25 pounds in 3 months, but it will be progress you can build on. Plus, it will make you feel good! The point here is developing consistency, one small step at a time.


Stack your habits

Once that first routine has become a habit and you are consistently walking 30 minutes 5 days a week, set a new goal to add to it. Maybe now you add a weekly fitness class, or start cooking more dinners at home. The idea here is to make small, deliberate changes to your lifestyle that you can sustain, ultimately getting you to your main goal.


As you add new habits, stacking them one on top of the other, eventually you'll find that you've made a half dozen small changes, or more. What started as a 30 minute walk 5 days a week is now daily walks, 3 weekly fitness classes, home cooked dinner on weeknights, a better sleep routine, and you carry a water bottle around with you everywhere you go.


Because of all these new habits, you have more energy than you've had in years, you are more active with your kids, more focused and productive at work, your confidence is sky high, and your libido has come roaring back.


Finding accountability

Something that can trip people up is accountability. Some of you can hold yourselves accountable and build consistency on your own, while nudges from others can be frustrating. Others need accountability from friends or family, because they won't hold themselves accountable otherwise, and may struggle without those external expectations.


For example, you may be someone who is really good at getting out and exercising 3 - 4 days a week, all by yourself, even when you really don't feel like it. You don't need anybody to drag you to the gym, or the expectation of other people in the class that you'll be there on a certain day.

Or, you love group classes or running with a friend because you know others expect you to show up. If it were just up to you, you probably wouldn't get out to exercise on your own.


There's no right or wrong answer here, but it is important to know which group you fall into. Knowing how you deal with expectation and accountability will help you know what you need when you are setting goals. Are you going to need someone to exercise with you? Do you need someone to remind you to drink more water? When it has been a long week and you are exhausted, will you stick to the plan and cook a healthy dinner, or will you order out?


This is important for me to know as a coach, as well. Often, people really need someone to hold them accountable to the changes they have decided to make in their lives and the steps they are taking to get there. Other times, I can give people new directions and they will mostly stick with them, as long as they make sense. The point is, how you make habits is important!


As the new year approaches and you are thinking of starting a resolution, having a coach in your corner is a pretty smart plan. Getting yourself healthy and fit all on your own without any help is possible, but I wouldn't recommend it. A coach (like me!) can help you set those small, stackable goals and help you stick with them, especially when it starts to get hard. So whatever your New Year's resolution may be, I'm here to help you get started.


Spots for my 3 and 6 month programs will open up in the new year. Secure your spot by signing up for my wait list now: https://forms.gle/XuZAxhZmNr5J6BzQ6


If you haven't already, download my free e-book, "5 diet mistakes you are probably making (and how to fix them!)"



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